A tale of three Christmases

“I reckon the Mission saved my life,” says Frank who is sitting in the afternoon sun on the back step of his small social housing flat.

He makes that point often during a long, honest talk about his journey to now when he is happy, sober and lives in a warm safe home.

Many middle-aged men and women turn to us for help to turn their lives around – and there is always hope.

Frank is a wonderful example of how with the right support at the right time a life can be dramatically changed for better, even when there have been decades of spiralling down and, in his case, almost dying.

A snapshot of three Christmases shows how things changed because he was determined to save himself and because of the help we were able to give him.

Go back to Christmas 2023 and Frank was living in an old caravan and drinking himself to death. “On Christmas Day I called over to my daughters with presents for the kids. I was there about 15 or 20 minutes and couldn’t handle it. All I wanted was to get away from everybody and go back to the caravan and drink. I spent Christmas Day drinking by myself.”

By Christmas 2024 he was living in our City Mission transitional housing facility called Whakaora Kāinga.

Our residents live in a structured communal setting, supported by our compassion and expert programmes. They re-learn how to live well, to be good tenants and best of all to believe in themselves. On December 25, 2024, a sober Frank left Whakaora Kāinga to be with his family and grandkids and stayed the whole day.

“It was just nice to be there in body and mind. The family definitely noticed the difference. They knew I had got myself sussed out. They even made a non-alcoholic trifle just for me and the kids,” he remembers fondly.

This Christmas, still sober Frank is in the social housing unit we helped him find and will join his family again … but he says he might even do some hosting in his own little place and you can see his pride that that is an option.

Life is so different now to the rock bottom Frank reached. But while we were alongside him, he also made the decision to change and kept to it.

“I would drink until 4am in the morning, then I would get up and walk to the supermarket still drunk to get there by 7am. I’d be dry retching all the way because I needed that hit. As soon as I got my bottle, I’d have a guzzle, then sit for 10 minutes, and I would be as good as gold.”

Frank knew he was killing himself and tried to cut back but that brought on seizures, including one that put him unconscious in hospital.

When he got out, he lived in a tent for a few days, then came to the City Mission and talked to our nurse. He was sweating and shaking because he needed more drink, but he was still fighting against that. Instead, he got a prescription from a doctor to help him while the self-detox occurred.

Most importantly he also got a place in Whakaora Kāinga where he was supported while he made lifestyle changes to continue the move to a new life.

Sitting with him today on the back step is his City Mission navigator who has kept in touch to help him stay on track as we do with all our ex-residents.

“I’m proud of my kids,” Frank says, “And without saying it I think they are proud of me for having come out the other side.”